Giving Grief Meaning
A Method for Transforming Deep Suffering into Healing and Positive Change
How do you make sense of loss and tragedy? How do you move through obstacles and begin to find your way back to joy and light when darkness seems overwhelming? After the sudden and devastating loss of her infant daughter, Lily Dulan, a marriage and family therapist (MFT), psychotherapist and certified yoga teacher, meditated, prayed, and reflected on the only thing she had left of her baby girl - her name. In her courage and desire to move through her pain, Lily created The Name Work, a cross pollination of proven psychological modalities, 12-step wellness tools, spiritual healing applications, meditation and ancient yoga. In her heartfelt memoir, Lily shares her personal healing journey and her method for unleashing the power in names to help move through grief and loss in a thoughtful and transformative way.
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What’s in a name? Meanings!
Names hold profound significance. Names -- of people, places, and objects -- are how we define ourselves, others and how we make sense of our world. The Name Work method teaches you how to assign distinct qualities to each letter in a name (a deceased loved one’s or your own) and how to create positive affirmations for each letter’s attribute. Developing Inspired Grouping of Qualities (IGQ’s) and affirmations helps those who practice this method move through grief and suffering of all kinds. Once mastered, The Name Work is a tangible and personal self-healing method for whatever obstacles come up in day-to-day life. A unique, new wellness tool for healing and self-discovery, The Name Work method also includes:
- Affirmations, self-guided questions, meditations, and practices to perform each day
- An A-Z dictionary of qualities to help create your own Inspired Grouping of Qualities and Affirmations
- A first-hand account of the author’s personal healing journey
If you benefited from books like Finding Meaning, It’s OK That You’re Not OK, or Healing After Loss, then you’ll be inspired by Giving Grief Meaning.
THOUGHTS ABOUT Giving Grief Meaning
It is often major and seemingly insurmountable obstacles that enable us to realize our highest potential and imbue life with greater meaning and purpose. While Lily’s journey is no exception to that edict, the work she’s developed as a result is exceptional and a powerful way for others to find meaning and peace in the face of trauma and grief.”
Reverend Michael Beckwith, New Thought minister, author, and founder of the Agape International Spiritual Center, from the foreword of Giving Grief Meaning
Death and loss are potent experiences that can overwhelm a person for life. This could have been the fate of Lily Dulan after her beloved newborn daughter Kara unexpectedly died. Her moving account of how her daughter's memory eventually led her to a life's vocation of helping others is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit.”
Sharon Salzberg author of Real Happiness and Real Love
Lily Dulan had to bear the unbearable, a loss that is every parent’s nightmare. This book relays her journey from the valley of excruciating pain to a peaceful life on the other side of it. She began the journey not knowing if peace would ever be hers again. She was rewarded for each step she took in trying to find it, discovering keys that indeed unlocked the way for her and which now she can share with others.”
Lily Dulan has written a courageous book filled with depth and vulnerability. Through the devastating loss of her beloved daughter Kara, Lily was inspired to create the process of 'The Name Work.' I’m sure that it will prove to be an accessible and useful tool for many people to give meaning to their grief. This book is filled with real-world examples of love overcoming despair. Lily encourages the reader to feel their own truth and develop empowering thoughts in sync with that truth. For all who are grieving, this book fulfills its promise to bring readers a sense of renewal, love and ultimate peace of mind.”
Judith Orloff, MD, Author of The Empaths Survival Guide
I recommend Lily’s Giving Grief Meaning and The Name Work to the black and brown communities. Lily is a real student and creator in this field. and has been ahead of the curve in terms of recognizing her own privilege and working towards positive change. Lily does this through her teaching as well as the Kara Love Project, the foundation she started in her daughter’s memory.
I can speak from experience on how this type of work has helped me in my life. I was raised by a single mother, grandmother and aunt here in Los Angeles. My mother had me at 14 years old. My grandmother was a Jewish Holocaust survivor. She had black children in the 60’s during the civil rights era. And was a single mother to 3 children. Social and economic racism was a part of our life. We lived in the ghetto of South LA until I was 6 years old. Then moved to Mid City LA. My father was in prison for most of my life. I had no male role models in my life. I remember thinking if I wanted to make it out and be successful In the world, I needed to play professional sports, sell drugs, or become a famous musician or entertainer. Those were my options.
Practicing affirmations really played a big role in me reprogramming my thinking and taking responsibility for my life in my 20’s. Even though I was not a good student in public schools, I learned to enjoy reading as a young adult. And through that, I discovered affirmations and the power of positive thinking. The Heart of the Buddha was the first book that opened my eyes in a spiritual way. Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich affirmations and work helped me financially get started on my journey. Lily’s Name Work method is a fresh and new approach to working with affirmations. Working with names that are special to us makes the work tangible and will definitely inspire the next generation of seekers. I am a firm believer in this type of work. And If I can do it, I think so many more kids from my background can too. I think getting it in the hands of kids at an early age can really make a big difference. Starting off with affirmations each day is a step forward. The books, reading materials, and homework found in works such as Giving Grief Meaning should be a part of the everyday public school curriculum. I think the self reflective affirmations will help heal the traumatic experiences that so many of us have had. So thank you Lily for inspiring us and the next generation with Giving Grieg Meaning and The Name Work. I know it will and is continuing to change lives.”
Interested in having Lily speak at your event?
Here are some of the topics she can discuss:
Grief, loss, suffering, trauma, addiction, body image, LGBTQ, abuse, SIDS, recovery, 12-step and more.
Past The Name Work speaking and educational engagements:
- Antioch University
- California Association of Social Rehabilitative Agencies (CASRA)
- Foster Nation Guardian Scholars Program
- Brave Trails
- Bhakti Yoga Shala
- Venice Arts